John Q.

This does not pertain to poker in any way, it's just a random thought. Have you ever seen that movie, John Q? It's on right now and I got to thinking: Denzell Washington's character is a TERRIBLE person. He justifies holding up a hospital with the threat of murder in an attempt to save his son's life. His son is like on some donor list for a new ass or something, but he's like 8th on the list (too low on the list and will definitely die if he doesn't get this new organ (you see, time is of the essence)). Denzell's character blames rich people or something and then takes a hospital hostage, forcing the doctor to save his son by installing a donor ass for him. Anyway, I got to thinking about a new movie idea. It's kind of like a sequel, but more like a side story. I'll call it: Denzell Washington's Character from John Q is a Terrible Person and the plot will go a little something like this....

An innocent child has been on a donor list for several years. He has been waiting patiently like everyone else. His parents are good, godfearing people who pay their bills and are not poor. One day, the kid's mother gets a phone call from an unknown number.

"Mrs. Name," the voice says, "we have found a new ass for your son. It's a perfect match."

The mother bursts into tears but, no, these were not tears of joy. Oh, no.You see, the kid died the day before due to ass complications. In the midst of her sadness and sorrow, the mother remembers something she saw on the news a week earlier. She remembers something about some dude, whose kid was 8th on the ass donor list at the time, holding a hospital hostage until a doctor put a new ass on his kid. She remembers that the doctor obliged, and that the dude's kid lived. She remembers that her own child was first on the list at the time, and that he's dead now (which is actually a pretty fresh memory).

Hell, I could keep it going. I could make a sequel where Denzell's son grows up to be a mass murderer or child molester or, even better, just some bum who openly brags about purposely doing nothing with life because he thinks the spitefulness of such an act is somewhat hilarious. None of the above would be all that ridiculous with the kind of person that raised him.

Side note 1: And don't give me some crap about how any good parent should do ANYTHING to protect their kid or something, or that Denzell's satan-like character may have been acting irrationally at the time, considering he has a dying son, and I'll never understand because I don't have kids. That's crap. That's crappier than (but not nearly as funny as) Tim McGraw's acting skills in Friday Night Lights. Terrible job McGraw. If you're of this line of thinking, honestly, please stop reading my blog, and I hope to see you in a poker room. You are a moron. Hey, I just got an idea for a new post...

Side note 2: Any use of the terms "acting" and "skills" in the above paragraph is a loose reference.